Add /insult. Refactor code.
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								insults.txt
									
									
									
									
									
								
							| @@ -1,31 +1,30 @@ | |||||||
| Owww ... Such a stupid idiot. | ##name## don't drink and type. | ||||||
| Don't drink and type. | I think ##name## should go home or better a mental asylum. | ||||||
| I think you should go home or better a mental asylum. | Command not found. Just like ##name##'s brain. | ||||||
| Command not found. Just like your brain. | ##name## do you realize you are making a fool of yourself? Apparently not. | ||||||
| Do you realize you are making a fool of yourself? Apparently not. | ##name##, you can type better than that. | ||||||
| You can type better than that. | Bot rule 544 section 9 prevents me from replying to stupid humans like ##name##. | ||||||
| Bot rule 544 section 9 prevents me from replying to stupid humans like you. | ##name## sorry, we do not sell brains. | ||||||
| Sorry, we do not sell brains. | ##name## believe me you are not normal. | ||||||
| Believe me you are not normal. | ##name## I bet your brain feels as good as new, seeing that you never use it. | ||||||
| I bet your brain feels as good as new, seeing that you never use it. | If I wanted to kill myself I'd climb ##name##'s ego and jump to your IQ. | ||||||
| If I wanted to kill myself I'd climb your ego and jump to your IQ. | Zombies eat brains... ##name## is safe. | ||||||
| Zombies eat brains... you're safe. | ##name## didn't evolve from apes, they evolved from ##name##. | ||||||
| You didn't evolve from apes, they evolved from you. | ##name## come back and talk to me when your I.Q. exceeds your age. | ||||||
| Come back and talk to me when your I.Q. exceeds your age. | ##name## i'm not saying you're stupid, I'm just saying you've got bad luck when it comes to thinking. | ||||||
| I'm not saying you're stupid, I'm just saying you've got bad luck when it comes to thinking. | ##name## what language are you speaking? Cause it sounds like bullshit. | ||||||
| What language are you speaking? Cause it sounds like bullshit. | ##name## stupidity is not a crime so you are free to go. | ||||||
| Stupidity is not a crime so you are free to go. | ##name## is proof that evolution CAN go in reverse. | ||||||
| You are proof that evolution CAN go in reverse. | I would ask ##name## how old they are but I know they can't count that high. | ||||||
| I would ask you how old you are but I know you can't count that high. | As an outsider ##name##, what do you think of the human race? | ||||||
| As an outsider, what do you think of the human race? | ##name## brains aren't everything. In your case they're nothing. | ||||||
| Brains aren't everything. In your case they're nothing. | Ordinarily people live and learn. ##name## just lives. | ||||||
| Ordinarily people live and learn. You just live. | ##name## I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it really works. | ||||||
| I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it really works. | ##name## keep talking, someday you'll say something intelligent! (I doubt it though) | ||||||
| Keep talking, someday you'll say something intelligent! (I doubt it though) | ##name## Shock me, say something intelligent. | ||||||
| Shock me, say something intelligent. | ##name##'s IQ's lower than their shoe size. | ||||||
| Your IQ's lower than your shoe size. | Alas! ##name##'s neurotransmitters are no more working. | ||||||
| Alas! Your neurotransmitters are no more working. | ##name## are you crazy you fool. | ||||||
| Are you crazy you fool. | Everyone has the right to be stupid but ##name## is abusing the privilege. | ||||||
| Everyone has the right to be stupid but you are abusing the privilege. | ##name## I'm sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. I thought you already knew that. | ||||||
| I'm sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. I thought you already knew that. |  | ||||||
|  |  | ||||||
|   | |||||||
							
								
								
									
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							| @@ -120,18 +120,6 @@ function send_gif($gif_url, $reply=false) { | |||||||
|   return $result; |   return $result; | ||||||
| } | } | ||||||
|  |  | ||||||
| // Returns Insults |  | ||||||
| function get_insults($username) { |  | ||||||
|   global $decoded; |  | ||||||
|   if ($decoded->{"message"}->{"from"}->{"id"} == 394312580){ |  | ||||||
|     return "Sorry master, I am unable to do that."; |  | ||||||
|   } |  | ||||||
|   else { |  | ||||||
|     $insults = file('insults.txt'); |  | ||||||
|     return $insults[rand(0,count($insults)-1)]; |  | ||||||
|   } |  | ||||||
| } |  | ||||||
|  |  | ||||||
| // Generates random words | // Generates random words | ||||||
| function rand_words($onewordmode) { | function rand_words($onewordmode) { | ||||||
|   global $command_list; |   global $command_list; | ||||||
| @@ -156,19 +144,17 @@ function rand_words($onewordmode) { | |||||||
|     send_text(implode(' ', $words)); |     send_text(implode(' ', $words)); | ||||||
|   } |   } | ||||||
|   else { |   else { | ||||||
|     send_text(get_insults()); |     send_text("Ever heard of numbers?", true); | ||||||
|   } |   } | ||||||
| } | } | ||||||
|  |  | ||||||
| function rand_question() | function rand_question() { | ||||||
| { |  | ||||||
|   $questions = file('rand_questions.txt'); |   $questions = file('rand_questions.txt'); | ||||||
|   $question = $questions[rand(0,count($questions))]; |   $question = $questions[rand(0,count($questions))]; | ||||||
|   send_text($question); |   send_text($question); | ||||||
| } | } | ||||||
|  |  | ||||||
| function media_wiki($base_url) | function media_wiki($base_url) { | ||||||
| { |  | ||||||
|   global $command_list; |   global $command_list; | ||||||
|   $search_query = ""; |   $search_query = ""; | ||||||
|   for ($i=1; $i < count($command_list); $i++) { |   for ($i=1; $i < count($command_list); $i++) { | ||||||
| @@ -196,8 +182,7 @@ function media_wiki($base_url) | |||||||
|   send_html($text); |   send_html($text); | ||||||
| } | } | ||||||
|  |  | ||||||
| function coin() | function coin() { | ||||||
| { |  | ||||||
|    $random = rand(0,1); |    $random = rand(0,1); | ||||||
|    if ($random == 1) { |    if ($random == 1) { | ||||||
|       send_text('Heads', true); |       send_text('Heads', true); | ||||||
| @@ -221,8 +206,7 @@ function get_gif($force) { | |||||||
|   return $image_url; |   return $image_url; | ||||||
| } | } | ||||||
|  |  | ||||||
| function yes_or_no() | function yes_or_no() { | ||||||
| { |  | ||||||
|   global $command_list; |   global $command_list; | ||||||
|   if (!isset($command_list[1])){ |   if (!isset($command_list[1])){ | ||||||
|     send_text('You know, you also have to ask the question.', true); |     send_text('You know, you also have to ask the question.', true); | ||||||
| @@ -281,10 +265,48 @@ function kys() { | |||||||
|     } |     } | ||||||
|   } |   } | ||||||
|   else { |   else { | ||||||
|     send_text("Do you want to kill yourself?\n\nIf no, reply to someone with /kys to kill them.", true); |     send_text("Do you want to kill yourself?\n\nIf no, reply to someone with /kys to kill them or run /kys username/name.", true); | ||||||
|   } |   } | ||||||
| } | } | ||||||
|  |  | ||||||
|  | // Insult | ||||||
|  | function send_insult() { | ||||||
|  |   global $decoded; | ||||||
|  |   global $bot_name; | ||||||
|  |   global $command_list; | ||||||
|  |   $insults = file('insults.txt'); | ||||||
|  |   $random_insult = $insults[rand(0,count($insults)-1)]; | ||||||
|  |   if ($decoded->{'message'}->{'reply_to_message'}->{'from'}->{'username'} == $bot_name){ | ||||||
|  |     send_text("Watch who you talk to.", true); | ||||||
|  |     return; | ||||||
|  |   } | ||||||
|  |   if (isset($decoded->{'message'}->{'reply_to_message'})) { | ||||||
|  |     if (isset($decoded->{'message'}->{'reply_to_message'}->{'from'}->{'username'})){ | ||||||
|  |       $username = '@' . $decoded->{'message'}->{'reply_to_message'}->{'from'}->{'username'}; | ||||||
|  |       $random_insult = preg_replace('/##name##/', $username, $random_insult); | ||||||
|  |     } | ||||||
|  |     else { | ||||||
|  |       $first_name = $decoded->{'message'}->{'reply_to_message'}->{'from'}->{'first_name'}; | ||||||
|  |       $random_insult = preg_replace('/##name##/', $first_name, $random_insult); | ||||||
|  |     } | ||||||
|  |     send_text($random_insult); | ||||||
|  |   } | ||||||
|  |   elseif (isset($command_list[1])){ | ||||||
|  |     $username = $command_list[1]; | ||||||
|  |     if ($username == "@quadnite_bot" || $username == "Quadnite" || $username == "quadnite"){ | ||||||
|  |       send_text("Watch who you talk to.", true); | ||||||
|  |     } | ||||||
|  |     else { | ||||||
|  |       $random_insult = preg_replace('/##name##/', $username, $random_insult); | ||||||
|  |       send_text($random_insult); | ||||||
|  |     } | ||||||
|  |   } | ||||||
|  |   else { | ||||||
|  |     send_text("Do you want to insult yourself?\n\nIf no, reply to someone with /insult to insult them or run /insult username/name.", true); | ||||||
|  |   } | ||||||
|  | } | ||||||
|  |  | ||||||
|  |  | ||||||
| // Sends back JSON | // Sends back JSON | ||||||
| function json() { | function json() { | ||||||
|   global $var; |   global $var; | ||||||
| @@ -293,7 +315,7 @@ function json() { | |||||||
| } | } | ||||||
| // Start Message | // Start Message | ||||||
| function start() { | function start() { | ||||||
|   send_text('Hi, I am Quadnite. If you are chatting with me in private, you are most likely doing it wrong. Add me to a group for fun. Do not promote me to an admin or I WILL hate you.'); |   send_text('Hi, I am Quadnite. If you are chatting with me in private, you are most likely doing it wrong. Add me to a group for fun.'); | ||||||
| } | } | ||||||
|  |  | ||||||
| function help() { | function help() { | ||||||
| @@ -387,6 +409,10 @@ $modules = array( | |||||||
|   array( |   array( | ||||||
|     "command" => "/help", |     "command" => "/help", | ||||||
|     "function" => "help();" |     "function" => "help();" | ||||||
|  |   ), | ||||||
|  |   array( | ||||||
|  |     "command" => "/insult", | ||||||
|  |     "function" => "send_insult();" | ||||||
|   ) |   ) | ||||||
| ); | ); | ||||||
|  |  | ||||||
| @@ -406,9 +432,4 @@ foreach ($modules as $module ) { | |||||||
|     exit(); |     exit(); | ||||||
|   } |   } | ||||||
| } | } | ||||||
|  |  | ||||||
| // If message is a reply, exit |  | ||||||
| if (isset($decoded->{"message"}->{"reply_to_message"})) { |  | ||||||
|   exit(); |  | ||||||
| } |  | ||||||
| ?> | ?> | ||||||
|   | |||||||
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